I have to admit, life never turns out the way you expect. If you would’ve asked me a few years ago where I’d be at this age, I probably would’ve said I’d be married and maybe even have kids by now. But God’s plans are much better than ours, and clearly His plan for me is on a different schedule than mine. All I can say is thank goodness for that!

This season of my life is filled with learning and growing and finding what I’m passionate about and loving the people in my life to the best of my ability. Although it might look different from other people’s stories, I have more peace and excitement now than I’ve ever had before. Which I am SO thankful for!

In honor of turning 25 I thought it would be fitting to share 25 of the most valuable things I’ve learned so far in my 25 years of life. I hope they can encourage you in some way, wherever you are on your journey!

Dress (dupe for this one; also love this similar one) | Shoes (similar pair, also love these ones)

25 things I’ve learned in 25 years

1. Your parents are usually always right.

2. You don’t have to do the same thing everyone else is doing just because everyone else is doing it.

3. Most worries & fears are so much bigger in your head than they are in reality.

4. What you care about as a teenager is probably not what you’re going to care about as an adult. You think you know everything, but you actually don’t. In fact you basically know nothing.

5. When you go on adventures, make sure you take pictures of the people you’re with, not just the places you go. Those are the memories you’ll cherish the most.

6. Nothing lasts forever. Seasons come and go, good and bad. Something new is always coming.

7. Nobody remembers who the cool people were in high school. “Cool” doesn’t actually exist anymore once you’re an adult.

8. Having a boyfriend/significant other is not the key to happiness.

9. You’ll never fix your problems by running from them. You can’t run from yourself. You’ll never have true peace until you face them head on.

10. If you’re not sure what to do about something, trust your gut. As a wise person once told me, “When in doubt, don’t!”

11. Going to college doesn’t automatically make you successful. And not going to college doesn’t automatically make you a failure. Life is what you make of it.

12. It’s not about where you go, it’s about who you’re with. Anywhere can be a blast with the right people, or even the most extravagant vacation can be miserable with the wrong people. 

13. Life is too short to be stuck doing something you hate everyday. If you’re not happy with where you are, change it.

14. Nobody is going to respect you if you don’t respect yourself first.

15. If you try to do everything at once, you’re never going to accomplish anything. Instead, focus on one thing at a time and take baby steps to reach your goal.

16. How you look doesn’t matter – what matters is your confidence in yourself.

17. No person/thing/achievement/circumstance is going to make you happy. Only you can choose to be happy wherever you are (and only with God’s help).

18. Less is more. Physical clutter causes anxiety, but owning a small number of things that are valuable and useful will clear your mind and give you peace.

19. Praying is the most important thing you can ever do. Not just because it changes your circumstances, but because it changes you.

20. Life is too short not to eat the chocolate once in a while. Or the donut, or the french fries, or the piece of cake. It’s all about moderation.

21. You’re never going to “get there.” Every hurdle in life is a stepping stone to the next challenge. You’re never finished growing.

22. When you’re feeling stressed out, sometimes the best thing you can do is take a break and go to bed early. Let yourself recharge and start again in the morning.

23. Sometimes you have to learn the hard way. But hindsight is 20/20 and you’ll wish you took the advice before you made the mistakes!

24. Friends come and go but family is family, so those relationships are worth investing in.

25. Apart from Jesus you’ll never find what you’re looking for. You’ll never know true peace, joy, or contentment until you surrender your life to Him 100%. You’ll spend your life chasing happiness, but you’ll never reach it.

Live and learn

These things I’ve learned have come from years of experiences, challenges, mistakes, and growth. What about you? What are the biggest life lessons you’ve learned that you would want to share with others? I hope you’re having a lovely March, friends. Thanks for reading and thanks for being part of my life!

Xo,

Becka

P. S. – Last year I wrote a letter to my younger self for my 24th birthday, and here’s the truth about blogging.

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The post 25 Things I’ve Learned in 25 Years appeared first on Live It Lovely.

That’s why these self-care habits are focused on creating more peace and joy in everyday life. My goal is to combat any anxiety or depression that might sneak in when I’m not taking care of myself. I like to keep things simple, which is why these habits are all very simple to add to your daily and weekly routine. I hope you find these self-care habits beneficial to your life as well!

Why I’m focusing on peace and joy

Anxiety and depression are so rampant in today’s world, so I know many of you can relate to experiencing one or both of them in some form or another. But peace is like the opposite of anxiety, and joy is like the opposite of depression. I believe that the more peace and joy we have, the less we’ll experience anxiety or depression.

But where do we get more peace and joy?

I want to preface the rest of this post with this: I firmly believe that there’s no such thing as true peace or joy apart from Jesus. Plain and simple: you can do all the self-care in the world, but you’ll never be filled without His love and forgiveness.

Over the years I’ve been able to recognize and overcome a lot of my own mental and emotional turmoil. I can say for a fact that the biggest reason these haven’t been a worse issue in my life is because of my relationship with God. Nothing can help like the power of prayer, and the healing that comes from truly being changed from the inside out by Jesus.

Now in addition to that, there are so many tools and ways to deal with anxiety and depression that don’t require taking medication or paying for professional help (not that those aren’t valuable and sometimes necessary)!

They have to do with how we live our lives: what we spend our time on, what kind of people we surround ourselves with, what we eat, how well we sleep, how much exercise we get, and so on.

Simple self-care habits

I’ve been integrating in a few daily habits as well as some weekly self-care habits into my routine. I’m loving the positive affect they’re having so far! Of course, I don’t get to all of these every day, or every week.

Remember, it’s okay to miss some every so often. What matters is that you make an effort to be consistent and build some good-for-you habits into your daily life! Regular practice of these self-care habits will help you grow more peace and joy on a regular basis, so there just won’t be room for the weeds of anxiety or depression to pop up.

Daily self-care habits

• Quiet time (prayer & Bible reading) every morning
• Exercising for 30 minutes every day (even if it’s just a walk – this is SO good for my mental health and always impacts my day positively so I don’t like to skip even one day!)
• Journaling, at least 2 or 3 times a week when I have time
• Limiting how much time I spend on social media daily
• Making sure I spend a little time outside each day

Weekly self-care habits

• Taking a whole day off of social media (Sundays)
• Prepping for a new week by taking a detox bath, planning out my week on my calendar, journaling, and going to bed early on Sunday evenings

“Self-care Sunday” is my new favorite thing this year! Sometimes I feel like I have so much to do to get ready for the week that taking the time to slow down feels like too much effort. But when I do even one of these things, I feel so much more relaxed and peaceful. I can go to sleep with a clear mind and start the week fresh!

If you work a regular 9-5 job or you’re in school during the week, it might take a little extra effort to get all your weekend chores and errands done on Saturdays. But I can tell you it’s so worth it to leave Sundays open! You can unplug, relax, spend time with family, prep for the week, and start Monday feeling ahead rather than behind.

Changing habits for the better

Little routines can become habits and building blocks for a happier, healthier life. And I think it’s more than okay to make time to take care of yourself, because you can’t take care of anyone else if you’re not filled up first.

I think God wants us to be filled with peace and joy as His children. And this doesn’t mean a life of comfort and convenience, absent of any hardships. It means a steadfast state of mind and heart that carries us through the storms of life. And God should be our ultimate source of peace and joy. When we’re filled by Him, we have the courage to live out the purpose we were created for!

How can you take the time to add some simple self-care habits into your everyday routine? What do you think that would look like for you? Let me know if you found this post helpful! I’ll talk to you soon, friends!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – How to plant a succulent garden, and my everyday natural makeup routine.

P.P.S. – I’ve been using a new goal planner this year, and so far it’s helped me SOOO much in creating concrete and doable goals for myself. It’s called the PowerSheets goal planner by Cultivate What Matters, and I wanted to share a link for you guys to check out because I think these planners are SO AWESOME!

P.P.P.S. – Here’s a link to the 2018 prayer journal (pictured above) that I’ve been using this year to be more intentional during my quiet time. These journals were created by Val Marie Paper and it’s such a simple way to grow in your prayer life and relationship with God! I love it!

The post Simple Self-Care Habits for More Peace and Joy appeared first on Live It Lovely.

Now in my dream world, I’d love to own less things with greater value that will last a long time. But that can be a challenge because I love shopping and trying new styles! Sometimes I’m dying to try out a new trend, so buying something super expensive isn’t really a smart idea.

So where’s the balance? Here are a few things I’ve learned over the past few years of shopping successes and mistakes. Use these tips when you’re shopping to help you know when to save and when to splurge!

Tie front tee | Distressed jeans, also love the darker wash | Blush mules (and love these lavender ones) | Saddle bag | Earrings (similar) | Watch

When to save

If you’re anything like me, you probably have expensive taste. I love high quality items, like leather purses and shoes, because let’s be honest – they look so much nicer and last forever! In the past I’ve had faux leather items that wear down and fall apart quicker than I wish they had. It’s the worst.

But sometimes, spending a lot of money might not make the most sense, and buying the cheaper version can actually be the best option. Here are a couple clues to know when you should save your money and buy the bargain item instead:

1. When you’re not 100% sure

I can’t tell you how may times I’ve made this mistake: I’m shopping for something specific, and I’m stubborn and determined to have a higher value item instead of the bargain version.

I find one that kinda sorta mostly matches what I want, even though it’s not exactly perfect, and buy it because I’m impatient. But a few months later I realize I never really LOVED the item and then I regret spending so much on it!

I’ve had to sell nice things, like leather boots before, for much lower than I bought them, just because I wanted something nice and let myself settle on something I didn’t love that didn’t end up working in the long run. When you don’t have infinite funds, that’s what I’d call a fail. Don’t do that!

Instead, wait until you’re 100% sure you found the right item, or just save money and buy a cheap version!

2. When it’s a trendy item

If you’re thinking of investing in something, but you’re not sure, I can almost guarantee you can find a cheaper copy at a discount store (a.k.a. Target, Old Navy, Forever 21, etc.). It’s a great way to test out that style and see if it’s really what you want, and not end up with buyer’s remorse like I have.

(That’s what I decided to do with these blush mules from Target – I wanted to try out this style for cheap before buying a more expensive leather pair!)

If you decide you love the cheaper item, you can use it until it wears down, meanwhile saving up for the nicer one. I promise you’ll be SO much happier when you finally get the real deal and know for a fact that it will give you so much use!

And if you didn’t love it, at least you saved some money and still got to try out the trend.

When to splurge

I know I called this post when to save and when to splurge, but I think the word “splurge” carries the wrong connotation. Splurging means spending on impulse, without giving much thought ahead of time. But that’s not what I’m talking about here. I use the word loosely, but a better term for what I mean is wisely investing your money on something of higher quality.

It’s important to be wise with your money and be sure that when you’re buying something expensive, it’s going to be something you use for a long time or that can give you much more value than a cheap version! Here are two ways to know when you should splurge and get the expensive item:

1. When you’re willing to wait

You’ll know something’s worth investing in if you’ve saved up, looked at every option, and know exactly what you want (and know exactly how you’ll use it), and are willing to wait awhile to be sure. It might be hard, but try waiting at least a month before you buy an investment item. That way you can be sure it’s not just an impulse buy but something you know you’ll use for a long time.

2. When it’s a specialty item that you will use a ton

Something I’ve learned that’s worth the money is good jeans. Most lower priced jeans aren’t very comfortable or flattering and I struggle to find any that fit just right! That’s why I’m so happy I invested in these Levi’s. For me these jeans were a higher value purchase, and I had my eye on this particular pair for awhile. I’ve seen them on a lot of different people and knew that they would be flattering on anyone. So I finally ordered them, and so far they have not disappointed!

Even though ripped-knee jeans are a trend, I know they’ll be around for awhile. These jeans are great quality and will last a me long time, and of course they go with everything! And for real – I don’t think it’s worth it to buy a cheap pair of jeans that don’t make you look great from every angle. You should always feel good, look good, and be comfortable in jeans any day of the week!

Not to mention, Levi’s is a reputable brand and known for its quality. I’d say splurge on things like jeans or anything specialty (like running shoes for example) from brands that are known for that particular product! I recently invested in a pair of Nike running shoes, and yes, good athletic shoes are pricey, but totally worth it so I can avoid injuries and have support while running.

You do you

In the end, deciding when to save and when to splurge is totally up to you! Everyone’s budget, values, and lifestyle is different. Maybe you have money to spend on higher quality items, but if that’s not something you value, then you would probably rather buy lower priced clothing and use your money towards something else, like organic groceries or a vacation (or your Starbucks addiction ).

My number one piece of advice is don’t ever compromise your values to buy something that’s in style, or to impress anyone. Don’t be irresponsible with your money. Go with your gut and what makes the most sense for you.

Be wise, but don’t feel bad if you worked hard and budgeted for something nice and made a well-earned and useful purchase! You’ll save in the long run because of the use you’ll get from it. And you should enjoy the blessings God’s given you and live a little!

What about you? How do you decide when to save and when to splurge? Tell me your favorite brands and places to shop in the comments!

Xo,

Becka

P. S. – My favorite low-budget jeans, and my current everyday makeup routine.

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It would take an entire blog post to share all the information about these chemicals and what they do, but I’ll just list a few to get you thinking about it. Some of the biggest issues caused by chemicals in our skincare products are hormone disruption, increased risk of cancer, thyroid problems, reproductive harm, and respiratory issues, just to name a few. Some ingredients to look out for and avoid are phthalates, parabens, sodium lauryl sulphate (SLS), synthetic colors, lead, petrolatum, and fragrance. (Oh and FYI many of these chemicals are banned in Europe, but still somehow allowed to be used in products in the US…)

Concealer (face), Concealer (under-eye brightener) | Powder Foundation | Eluminating Powder quad | Mascara | Tinted lip balm | Brushes (newest version of my set)

I transitioned to natural shampoos and soaps a few years ago, and now I’m working on makeup – but it’s harder because it’s not easy to find natural makeup in stores. (Although it’s getting easier!) There are so many brands out there that pose as “natural” but are actually not at all, so beware of those! (Some drugstore brands for example include Neutrogena, Aveeno, etc.) Make sure to always read the ingredients.

I’ve discovered a few natural makeup brands at Sprouts, and I’ve been testing out some different products over the last year. Some are great, some have just been so-so… I need to do more research because I know there are a ton of great brands available online, I just don’t know what they are. (If you know of any truly natural makeup brands that you love and would recommend, please let me know!!!)

Today I’m sharing my everyday makeup routine, and the natural products I use! Not every single product I use is natural (yet), either because I’m just finishing an old product, or because I haven’t found a natural version of that product yet that I like. I hope this helps you in your own journey to a more natural and toxic-free life!

My everyday makeup routine

Brushes

First I want to mention the brushes I use every day. I’m a big fan of Real Techniques brushes, but I’ve recently started using EcoTools because they are made with more environmentally (and skin) friendly materials. I’ve loved them so far and use them for blending concealer, and applying foundation, blush, and brows. They are so soft and work great!

Start with concealer

For years I used to use liquid foundation, but now that I’m using a powder foundation, I like to put my concealer on first. (And this concealer for under my eyes.) I used to add it on top of my foundation only where I needed it, but I think it works much better under powder. I’m currently using the Pacifica concealer – it matches my skin great and has a good amount of coverage, but I will say that it’s not as long lasting as I wish it was.

After trying it the first time, I tried another brand available at Sprouts called Gabriel. But the color selection at Sprouts was so limited! They only had 2 colors – one was way too dark and the other too light. I bought the light one and ended up using it only to brighten up under my eyes. It did have a more concentrated coverage and was longer lasting than Pacifica, though.

Apply powder foundation

Like I mentioned before, I was ALWAYS a liquid foundation gal. I like a good amount of coverage and a natural look, which are two things I never thought I could get from a powder! But after no luck finding a good color match with any of the brands at Sprouts (yet again such a limited selection), I decided to try Mineral Fusion powder foundation because I found a great shade that matched me well. I’m actually amazed by how smooth and creamy it feels on my skin! I’ve been using it for about 6 months now and love it. (My color is Olive 2.)

A touch of blush & highlight

I’m not a huge contour person, especially not for everyday (mostly because I’m lazy and like to do my makeup in 5 minutes or less). But I do love a natural flush and a touch of shine for highlight. I love my foundation so much that I decided to try another Mineral Fusion product, the illuminating powder quad. I love these colors and how well they work together! It has a good amount of shimmer to it, but it’s actually very subtle on my skin. I like to just swirl all 4 colors together and put a little on the apples of my cheeks.

Brows (I need your help here!)

Okay, this is where I cheat and don’t use a natural product… yet. I’m not a huge fan of brow pencils and prefer a brow wax. My FAVE is actually Elf’s brow wax kit (Not necessarily recommending it, but hey if you like cheap and don’t care about ingredients then go for it!) because it works amazingly (I’ve finished 2 pans so far) and only costs 3 DOLLARS! Um hello I’m always down for a deal! And I love how it matches my brows perfectly, is subtle, looks natural, and lasts all day. But who the heck knows what that stuff is made of? I would love to find a natural alternative so somebody help me! Any recommendations?? If it’s an eyebrow pencil, you can recommend that too, and I’d be willing to try it!

Eyelashes

I think eyelashes are the key to a makeup look – whether it’s a full face and bold eyes, or just an everyday “no-makeup-makeup” look. I don’t use eyeliner on a regular basis, because 1. I’m lazy and 2. It has a bigger impact when I do actually wear it! But no matter what, I always do my lashes! And by that I don’t just mean mascara. I’m talking giving them a good curl! Nothing opens up your eyes and helps you look awake more, even without mascara. (I just use this curler – hello cheap! And works surprisingly well!)

For most days I’ll leave it at that, but if I have to work or I’m meeting up with friends, I’ll add some mascara to look more put-together. I’ve been using Pacifica’s mascara for awhile now and I think the quality’s great but I want to try the water resistant version next. And some days I’ll even go crazy and add some quick eyeshadow, just using my finger and the golden color on my eluminating powder quad.

Top it off with tinted lip balm

The last step of my everyday makeup routine is a coat of tinted lip balm. Right now I’m loving Burt’s Bees in the color Rose, because it’s soft, hydrating, and adds just the right amount of sheer red color to make my lips look alive and fresh. And just to clarify: I don’t think Burt’s Bees is one of the cleanest natural beauty brands out there. But they’re better than a lot of the completely fake “natural” brands, so I still use their products, because they’re much cleaner than say, Maybelline or another conventional drug store brand! Plus, I can find them at Target which makes my life a million times easier.

Switching to natural products can be hard

Yep, it’s true. For years I never wore much makeup or knew much about it. But in college I started watching those crazy makeup tutorials on YouTube, and it was like a whole new world! I loved learning about all the different brands and started experimenting with makeup more. But it was also right around the time that I started learning about all the harmful chemicals in most products. Before I could really get into makeup, I started switching to cleaner and more natural brands.

It’s still hard sometimes, because I had so much fun shopping for new makeup, but now that I know the negative effects the products can cause, I think the switch is worth it. And honestly, life feels simpler. It’s nice to not feel so controlled by a need to buy and try all the new products that are constantly being poured into the market. I spend a lot less because I only buy what I need and make sure it’s worthwhile to add to my life!

Maybe you’ve never thought about going natural or trying clean beauty products. Maybe this is like an introduction for you to something you’ve never thought about before! I just want you to know I that it’s totally okay to let the detoxifying process be slow and gradual, as you learn more and feel comfortable and confident in what you’re choosing to use and why.

Changing your lifestyle is impossible to do overnight, and if you attempt to do that, I doubt it would be sustainable. Like I said, I’ve gradually switched products one at a time over the last few years. And I still haven’t switched everything! It’s hard to let go of convenience and popularity and (if you’re like me) the cheapest prices. But I know if you take one small step at a time, you won’t regret it.

What about you?

Have you tried natural beauty products? What’s your experience so far? Does this resemble your everyday makeup routine or is yours totally different? Don’t forget to leave me your recommendations! Oh and let me know if you like this post! If yes I’ll do some more posts sharing the natural skin and hair products I’m using lately!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – A post about decluttering your life, and my first ever coffee chat with questions for YOU!

The post Everyday Makeup Using Natural Products appeared first on Live It Lovely.

Sweater | Jeans | Booties (similar) | Carry-all tote | JORD watch (gifted)

Scroll to the bottom to enter the $100 JORD giveaway!

This year is different though. In the last couple years I’ve learned some hard and valuable lessons. I’ve chased the wrong relationships at the wrong times, which has only led to heartbreak. God’s used recent seasons in my life to help me grow up, and now I see how important it is to treasure the season I’m in and not take all the blessings I already have for granted.

Embrace the season you’re in

Maybe you’re in a season like me – praying and hoping and waiting for something. Instead of dwelling on what you don’t have, choose to see the beauty of life all around you. Love your family and friends well. And most importantly learn to love yourself! Choose to see yourself through God’s eyes. You’re created beautiful and unique and lovely and unlike anyone else.

And maybe what you’re hoping for will never come… but that doesn’t mean your life isn’t complete and can’t be lived to the fullest! Chase your dreams. Pour into your future. Embrace every moment because each day is a gift. This season of life could be the biggest blessing in disguise! Remember, no season lasts forever. The good and the bad – it all comes and goes. So be thankful for what you have right in front of you!

Cherish every moment

If you’re in a relationship, you’re blessed. Cherish that and show the person in your life how much the moments with them mean to you! And if you’re single… you’re BLESSED! You have the gift of time! Don’t waste it.

Take the time to pray for your future hopes, and love those around you like it’s your last day, every day. Give a gift to show your love to whoever means the most to you – your mom, your best friend, your brother… or maybe yourself. Maybe you, like me, need the reminder most of all!

My favorite wood watches

When JORD gifted me with one of their wood watches, I immediately fell in love. The beauty of the watch to me represents everything I’ve been feeling lately, and I know that wearing it would serve as the perfect reminder to cherish every moment. Everything about this watch is beautiful – even the box it came in is gorgeous! I know it’ll be a timeless piece in my wardrobe for years to come.

I’m letting my watch be a reminder to appreciate the moments today. Just because you’re in a season of waiting doesn’t mean the time isn’t precious. And a unique wooden watch from JORD could be the perfect Valentine’s Day gift to show whoever it is you love (or yourself!) how much they mean to you!

JORD $100 GIVEAWAY!

If you love my JORD watch, you’re in luck! I’ve partnered with JORD to giveaway a $100 gift code towards any of JORD’S wood watches! Just click the link below to enter!

ENTER GIVEAWAY HERE

Even if you don’t win, every entrant will receive a 10% off coupon code to use towards your JORD purchase, just in time for Valentine’s Day! 

*GIVEAWAY ENDS FEBRUARY 4TH*
*COUPON CODES EXPIRE ON FEBRUARY 11TH*

My wood watch was gifted by JORD. Thanks for reading!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – How to make the most of your quiet time, and how to build a capsule wardrobe for spring.

The post Cherish Every Moment & Embrace the Season You’re In appeared first on Live It Lovely.

I’m much more into setting GOOD goals… ones that aim for progress even if I don’t complete them perfectly each time.  I’d rather work little by little and be further than I was before, than try to take on too much at once and fall flat on my face. Anybody else?!

So I bought this incredible new goal planner for 2018 (not sponsored in any way, I’m just a huge fan) and this past week I’ve been working through the exercises in the planner that help you set your goals for the year. And it’s been so amazing so far that I was inspired to write this post!

I’ve already learned so much about goal setting that I had to share. So here are three ways you can set some good goals for the new year and actually follow through on them!

3 ways to set good goals for the new year

1. Think baby steps

Maybe you’re like me – I’m someone who’s very slow at progress. I’m not spontaneous, I’m indecisive, and I take forever to finish things. I’m learning that I grow the most when I focus on taking the TINIEST baby steps at a time towards a goal.

This is my number one tip, and it’s taken me like 24 years to learn this (haha). But tiny bits of progress acutally ADD UP! What goals do you continue to put off because of how long they would take? Is there anything that seems like you’ll never reach it, so you don’t even try? What would take you an entire year (or more) to accomplish?

Take a second to think about how fast this year has gone by. Now think about the next year, and how fast it’ll be before we’re at the end of 2018. That time is going to pass, whether you’re working towards a new goal or not. Either way, it’s going to fly by. You never know how far you can be in a year if you choose to start taking baby steps right now!

2. Start big, work small

When choosing your goals, start with the big picture, and then work down to smaller steps. Think about who and where you want to be a year from now. What are your biggest values and what areas of your life do you want to grow in the most (like faith, family, friendships, work, health, money, etc.)?

Write down a handful of big goals, but make sure they’re realistic and concrete. Then break them down into smaller pieces, and spread those out into quarterly steps. Then break them down again into monthly tasks.

From there you can focus on a month at a time. Break your goals down AGAIN, so for each month you have weekly tasks, and then figure out what baby steps you need to take each day.

Start with just January, and then focus on the next month at the end of the last one. This is a great way to put some small actions onto your daily to-do list and check something off each day! When the goal is in bite-size pieces, it’s not nearly so daunting. You’ll be amazed how much progress and momentum you can create in a month. And before you know it, the months will be flying by and the progress will start adding up!

3. Give yourself grace

Last and final tip: GIVE YOURSELF GRACE! This my friend, might be the most important step. I guarantee you won’t reach every single goal you set out to accomplish this year. And you’ll for sure miss a day, or two, or three, or maybe more. You have to remember that it’s okay. But you can’t let yourself give up! Always aim for progress.

Before the year starts, take time to schedule a day of reflection at the end of each month. Write it down on your calendar! Use those times to check in with your goals and refresh them if you need to. What did you accomplish this month? What did you completely bomb? Have your goals changed? Do you need to readjust next month? Maybe you’ll have to slow down into even smaller baby steps, but just don’t stop.

Just start

Most people who set new year’s resolutions give up before January is even over. By December they might not even remember what their goals were for that year! And when they set out to make new goals, they write the same ones down for another year, and then another year passes and nothing ever changes. Well guys, I refuse to let that happen.

If you find yourself dissatisfied with any areas of your life, the great news is that you can use those negative emotions as fuel to change and grow! Being unhappy is sometimes healthy, because it’s a clue that change needs to happen. Without passion we’ll never have the motivation to actually DO something!

How do you plan to set good goals for the new year? Leave a comment and weigh in with your thoughts. We can keep each other accountable to reach our goals and have an amazing 2018!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – 4 productivity tips, and 3 amazing benefits of journaling regularly!

The post 3 Ways To Set Good Goals for the New Year appeared first on Live It Lovely.

Getting stuck in those slumps is the worst, and this past week has been one of those weeks. So today I’m sharing some tips for maintaining emotional health, because I know they can help prevent those seasons of emotional distress. And when those seasons are unavoidable, these tips will keep you functioning and able to get through them much more smoothly!

3 Ways to maintain emotional health

1. Let it out

It is SO important to get your feelings out! Whether it’s through journaling or talking to a trusted friend, sharing how you’re feeling is a huge step in the right direction. Sometimes just hearing your thoughts out loud can make your fears shrink, or make an answer to a problem become clear. So talk, write, pray, see a counselor; just LET IT OUT!

Related post: 3 Amazing Benefits of Journaling Regularly

2. Exercise

You’ve probably heard this one a million times, but that’s because it WORKS! Exercising allows you to channel all the pent-up energy in your body and burn it in a healthy way. This prevents the energy from going to your brain and leaving your thoughts and emotions in overdrive. Plus, it gives you something to focus on and helps you feel accomplished, which will give you an emotional boost. Not to mention that post-workout endorphin high! Your mind will be clearer and your body more relaxed which naturally eases symptoms.

3. Morning and evening routines

Maintaining morning and evening routines is probably the most important thing you can do for your emotional health. This is something you can work on all the time, so you’re prepared for whenever anxiety or depression does strike. A good morning routine could include quiet time, exercise, and eating a healthy breakfast; and a good evening routine could be turning off electronics, reading, journaling, stretching, and sticking to the same bedtime every night.

If these routines aren’t a habit, then it’s these simple tasks that can be the first to go out the window when you’re feeling down. This can throw off the rest of your day and make you feel less in control. But when you’re able to mindlessly follow your routines, even during a slump, then you’ll feel better prepared to face the day and continue to take care of yourself. And of course, by sticking to them every day, you’ll feel happier and healthier overall, which will help prevent future slumps.

A fall playlist

I think listening to music can be a great way to relieve stress and find comfort during hard times. Music has such a powerful affect on our emotions (which could honestly be good or bad), and with the right balance it can give us hope and help us feel less alone.

I created this fall playlist on Spotify so I could have a calming and relaxing soundtrack to play in the background throughout my day. Each song holds a sense of nostalgia for me and has been a favorite at some point in my life. It’s mostly acoustic which I think is perfect for autumn days. I hope you love it as much as I do!

What are some ways you maintain emotional health? Anything you would add to this list? Also let me know if you like the playlist and I’ll try to make some more in the future!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – In case you missed it: a casual fall outfit, and why you should declutter your life!

The post 3 Ways to Maintain Emotional Health + A Fall Playlist appeared first on Live It Lovely.

This is something I’ve wrestled with for years, wondering what’s wrong with me, and why can’t I seem to keep any friends? Maybe you’ve had those thoughts too. But I recently went through an experience that taught me about contentment, and about God’s sovereignty in our relationships.

By sharing my story and what I’ve learned from it, I hope I can encourage you to trust that God is faithful and will provide for you even in the midst of loneliness.

I’ve spent most of my life praying for true friends. The kind you can tell everything to, trust completely, be spontaneous with, and feel totally yourself around. And though I’ve had some friends like this, they’ve been few and far between.

I’m not angry about it. In the past I’ve felt sad, but I never blamed God for not giving me the kind of friendships I long for. I’m sure I play a part in it. I have walls up from past hurts and can be skeptical of people at first. (And I’m pretty shy and introverted too, on top of that.) But I don’t think it’s all my fault, or anyone else’s. Sometimes things just play out that way.

Growing up friendless

My circumstances growing up just didn’t made it easy for me to make a lot of friends. I never had a home church, so I didn’t have a solid church community. For middle and high school I went to a tiny private school. There were only so many cliques, and I just didn’t quite fit in with any of them. I spent a lot of my teenage years feeling lonely.

For college I went to a giant university, but I lived at home 30 minutes from campus. Plugging into community there wasn’t easy, but that wasn’t for lack of trying. I knew the importance of making an effort to pursue friendships, so I did my best.

I attended different Christian groups on campus, but since I didn’t live nearby I always felt like an outsider. Nothing ever really clicked. It almost felt like it was just too late for me to make friends. Everyone already had their besties, and despite my efforts I just couldn’t break into that territory with anyone.

It was exhausting trying to build new relationships. I always felt awkward, wondering if yet another person even liked me after meeting for coffee. I was drained and defeated, so I eventually gave up.

When God answered my prayers

Then I started praying more about it. I asked God to bring the right friends into my life at the right time. Until then I could be content with waiting. And it wasn’t long until my prayers were answered! Soon after I finished college, I was randomly invited into a new group of girls that was going to meet regularly, and everything clicked so perfectly.

We all became close really fast. Even though I was the brand new person, I never felt like an outsider. Our weekly meetings were the highlight of our weeks. I felt so full after our times together and excited to live the next week knowing I had a support system around me. I cried of happiness and thankfulness to God for finally answering my prayers.

God gives, and God takes away

But nothing lasts forever. Somewhere along the way there was a fallout. After 6 months of spending every weekend together, encouraging each other and growing in our faith together, it was a silly disagreement that caused our group to shatter.

Humans are humans, so I’m learning that there’s always some dysfunction in any relationship. Especially in a group– with so many people, it’s hard to predict how a conflict will resolve. Some will forgive and forget, but some may choose to hold onto hurt and bitterness.

Girls in the group began choosing sides. There was avoiding, there was gossip; then there was confrontation, hurt, and tears. I didn’t understand why this group was crumbling around me. I could see all sides of the disagreement, but somehow the sides misunderstood each other.

Humans are broken

Each girl was waiting for an apology from someone else, but no one was quick to offer forgiveness. In the end it seemed like some were more content with losing a friendship than fixing the problem.

I didn’t want to let go. I felt stuck in the middle, not belonging to any side. But half the group didn’t even want to see the other half any more, so there was no way we were all meeting together again. This group of friends vanished as fast as it had come.

My heart was broken. I didn’t want to lose these friendships. I reached out and met one-on-one with people. But something was different. Things felt awkward, even forced. So in my sadness I finally gave up my efforts. When I stopped reaching out, it seemed like nobody noticed. I felt abandoned.

For awhile I was bitter and even upset with God, wondering why He brought these friends into my life in the first place. I had no idea that I would feel emptier after the fallout than I did before I even met them.

Contentment

It’s been over a year since then. A lonely year, without God refilling the hole of friendship I still long for. But God gives and He takes away, because He’s God. And although some of the hurt still lingers, I’ve learned so much in hindsight.

I know God allowed that season for a purpose. At the time I was in a place where I desperately needed to be vulnerable and have accountability. God was so faithful to provide that for me. I know He answered my prayers with what I needed most, and used that season to draw me closer to Him in the long run.

I’ve learned that I’m okay on my own. Maybe loneliness is a blessing in disguise! It can be quiet at times, but God’s always there and He’s the best friend I could ever want. He’s teaching me to lean on Him so much more, and shown me that I don’t always need a bunch of friends around me to fully enjoy life!

Learning to give grace

I’ve realized that rejection is often not so much about me as it is about the person I feel rejected by. That’s where grace comes in. I’m learning not to take things so personally, and to believe the best about people. It could be that they’re struggling in other areas that I don’t know about.

Most importantly, I’m learning that to make true friends, you have to be one. And that’s something God is teaching me to do better every day. In the meantime, I’ve discovered that it can be a gift to be alone. I can spend more time with God, pour into my family, and pursue my passions. I know God’s preparing me for the next season when He’ll make me a friend to someone who truly needs one.

Have you been through a season of loneliness? What has God taught you through it? I’d love to hear your experience. We can encourage each other and remind each other that we’re never actually alone.

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – A letter to my younger self, and some simple self-care habits for more peace and joy.

The post What Loneliness Has Taught Me About Contentment appeared first on Live It Lovely.

Maybe you’ve tried to have a regular quiet time but haven’t found a routine you can stick to. Maybe you want to have a daily quiet time but don’t know where to start. Today I’m sharing some ideas for how you can make the most of your quiet time, because let’s face it: our time is precious. It’s something we can never get back, so we should use it well.

Remove distractions

First of all, I would recommend a quiet time in the morning before you start your day if at all possible. That might mean you have to readjust your schedule or even sacrifice a little bit of sleep. If you just can’t swing it, then another time will work, as long as you can go somewhere quiet to be alone with God. Maybe your lunch break, or in the evening after dinner.

The most important thing you can do is to remove all distractions. And by that I mainly mean your PHONE! When my phone is nearby, I’m always tempted to pick it up, even just to check the time. If I’m not careful I’ll start looking at something and quickly waste half my quiet time. How lame, right?! Leave your phone out of reach across the room so you’re not tempted to pick it up. Put it on airplane mode, and even set a timer if you need to so you know when your time’s up!

Use a real Bible

One of the biggest tips I have is to read an actual, physical Bible. For a couple years I only read my Bible in an app, and even though I was reading through a study almost every day, there was still a sense of disconnect with what I was reading.

When I switched back to my real Bible, I felt a huge difference. I realized that I retain so much more when I read Scripture on a page in the context of a book! It’s so important for me to be able to flip to different spots, highlight, underline, bookmark, and get familiar with each passage as part of the whole.

Start with worship

Okay, so you might actually need your phone for this part. Or your computer, or maybe you still use an ipod…? Haha. Recently I started listening to a worship song at the beginning of my quiet times, and I gotta say I’m loving it! It only takes a couple minutes, but it quiets my mind and heart before God. Find a song on Youtube, or make a playlist of your favorite worship songs on Spotify and just pick one. Spend a few minutes praising God. Then after the song, set a timer and immediately throw your phone across the room! Just kidding. Kind of.

Pick a reading plan

If reading the Bible regularly is not something you’ve done before, maybe it sounds overwhelming. So pick a simple study or devotional that can lead you through a reading plan! For the last couple years I’ve switched between She Reads Truth and the First 5 app, two different online devotional studies that you can follow along with daily. Either one is a good starting point, but recently I’ve felt that I need something a little more in-depth.

Maybe you’ve never read through the entire Bible, so you want to start with that! Try a read through the Bible in a year plan. There are so many to choose from! Even if it takes you longer than a year, it’s an awesome way to get familiar with the Bible as a whole. If you’ve never done it, I think it’s a must. You’ll grow and learn so much, promise.

Get a good study Bible

One of the biggest reasons people are afraid to read the Bible is because it can be hard to understand. A good study Bible is an extremely useful tool to help you comprehend what you’re reading. I have an ESV study Bible that I love. It’s kinda big and heavy, but I LOVE that it has insightful commentary on every page for almost every single verse. With the commentary, I can even read through a book of the Bible on my own, and find answers to any questions I have right there on the page!

Take notes

Try keeping a journal on hand to take notes during your Bible study time. You don’t have to necessarily write something down every day! But if a verse or thought ever stands out to you, it helps to write it down. You’ll retain what you’re learning better, and you’ll have a place to look back to for reference if you want to look something up later.

I like using the same journal I take notes in at church for my daily quiet times too. That way I can easily flip back to my church notes and make connections to what I’m studying on my own time!

Pray

Prayer is something we should be doing all throughout the day. But during your quiet time is a great time to pray more specifically and get a little deeper. I love praying out loud, which is why I like to do my quiet time alone in my room in the early mornings. Try talking openly with God about your life! Invite Him into your day and have a real conversation with Him.

If you can’t get alone in a quiet place, try writing your prayers! Journaling is a great way connect with God and can also help you process and focus better. Keeping a prayer journal (this one’s my fave) is such an awesome way to pray more intentionally for things that matter. And you can go back later and see how God answered!

Related post: 3 Amazing Benefits of Journaling Regularly

If you don’t have a lot of time…

Maybe you struggle to stick to a quiet time, because you just DON’T. HAVE. TIME. Girl I get it! But I wanna give you some hard truth… your relationship with God should be your first priority, period. If it’s not, I can guarantee that everything else in your life will suffer. But maybe you’re type A and it drives you crazy to miss a day, so much that it’s tempting to just give up (GUILTY)!

Batch your quiet times

I’ve been there too. I figured out that if I want to have an amazing prayer time AND dig deep into the Word all in one sitting, I’d need an entire hour of quiet time a day. But that’s just not always practical! So lately I’ve been batching my quiet times. What does that mean? Well it’s kinda like batching your tasks at work! When you pick one type of task to focus on each day of the week, you’ll get much more done because you won’t waste time switching between tasks throughout the day.

So why not apply that to quiet times too? If you only have 30 minutes in the mornings, maybe try reading your Bible during that time every other day. On the in-between days, spend that time praying and journaling. I’ve been doing this for the last few weeks and so far it’s working great!

Quality over quantity

Although it’s SUPER IMPORTANT to spend regular time with God, there’s no verse that says exactly how or when to do your quiet time. But when we look at how Jesus lived his life, we know that He rose early and went somewhere secluded to pray before the day began. If Jesus thought quiet time in the morning was important, then I’m thinking we should too!

Of course, your quiet time will have to adjust as you go through different seasons of life. When I was a teenager I read my Bible at night before bed (because waking up for school was a struggle), and I loved that too. You just have to go with the flow. It’s a relationship, after all, so it will evolve.

If you’re running late or just have a ton on your plate, it’s OKAY if you miss a day! Just pick it up the next day, or whenever you can. But it’s definitely something you should work to incorporate into your routine and make a habit. If you’ve never had a regular quiet time before, it’ll take some effort and sacrifice to get used to.

It’s a relationship

Once I started viewing my quiet time with God as a way to grow our relationship, my mindset shifted. Instead of seeing it as a chore, I thought about what it’s like to be in a relationship with someone. When you’re dating, you’re not necessarily going to see that person every single day. Sometimes you only have time for a special date night once a week (or maybe even less)!

But that set-aside time is something you look forward to throughout the week. It’s when you get to reconnect, do something fun together, talk about your week, and just get closer. It’s something you don’t want to take for granted, and the less of it you have, the more quality you want it to be!

Think of your quiet times as your dates with God. It’s special to be alone together, to talk, and to just be. So when you have less time in your schedule, it’s better to have 2 or 3 days a week of rich quality time with God, than 7 days of quick mindless prayer and speed-reading something you won’t retain later!

If  you work hard to integrate a quiet time into your daily life, I promise you’ll grow and your life will change for the better. What tips would you would add to this list? How do you make the most of your quiet time? Leave a comment and let me know, loves!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – 3 easy fall outfit ideas, and what loneliness has taught me about contentment.

The post How To Make The Most of Your Quiet Time appeared first on Live It Lovely.

I’m the kind of person who has a million goals at once, but more often than not I don’t reach them before I burn out or give up. I easily lose motivation or get overwhelmed and don’t always finish what I start.

This year I’ve learned that the key to productivity is taking baby steps to change your routine. Of course I’m still a work in progress, but by focusing on these productivity tips I’ve improved so much and hopefully you will too!

4 productivity tips for when you don’t feel motivated

Tip #1: have a plan (but don’t overplan!)

Having a plan is SO important for staying productive! But did you know there’s actually such a thing as over-planning? (Believe me, I’m the queen of it!) Do you spend forever writing long and elaborate to-do lists but then struggle to actually finish them? Yeah. Same here.

But what happens when you do the opposite and don’t have a plan at all? Your free time somehow vanishes and you find yourself mindlessly scrolling on your phone or watching TV for hours, right?

So it turns out that having a plan is critical in order to make your days productive. But it has to actually be doable instead of overwhelming. The key is to keep your to-do list as short and simple as possible. And by that I mean 5 TASKS OR LESS! That way you can spend less time planning and more time actually doing what you planned.

Also, try writing your list the night before! You’ve probably heard that one a million times, but I’m telling you it works. Sometimes it’s hard to get going first thing in the morning. Having a list already written down saves you the pressure of decision-making at the start of the day, and your most productive mental energy is used towards actually getting stuff done!

Tip #2: time-block your tasks into bite-size chunks

This might be the most useful of productivity tips I’ve ever learned! Maybe you find yourself procrastinating when there’s a big project you need to tackle but you know it’s going to take a long time. You get intimidated and put it off because it seems too daunting and you’re afraid you’ll never finish.

You need to break it down into bite-size chunks! When you focus on each step of a task one at a time, you’ll get much more done. Make a note of how much time you want to dedicate to each task when you write your to-do list. Keep it simple and try to break your list down into 15, 30, or 45 minute chunks.

Also, make sure you take small breaks between chunks! Even if you feel like you’re on a roll, taking a break for even 5 minutes to walk around and get some fresh air will help your mind stay focused all day long and help you avoid burnout.

Something I’ve been loving lately is the pomodoro technique – where you set a timer for 25 minutes and work uninterrupted for that time. Then take a 5 minute break, and do it again! After 4 rounds or “pomodoros”, you take a longer (20-30 minute) break. Try it and watch your productivity soar!

Remember – most things take longer to finish than you think. My best recommendation is to give yourself double the amout of time you think something is going to take! That way you don’t set yourself up for failure, and you’ll feel awesome if you get it done in less time than you planned!

Tip #3: pay attention to your feelings

Some days you might have a ton of energy and breeze through tasks to get a lot accomplished. But other days maybe you have no idea where start, and find yourself wasting time and getting nothing done.

Try paying attention your feelings on a productive day versus a day when you’re lacking motivation. Soon you’ll start to see how much your productivity is linked directly to your emotions. And if you’re anything like me, your emotions probably change on a daily basis!

Acknowledging how much your feelings can control your productivity is the first step. And then you have to make a conscious choice to be productive anyway! It’s that simple. It’s up to you to control your feelings instead of letting them control you.

Of course that’s so much easier said than done. But don’t worry – productivity is a habit that takes time and effort to form. If you mess up, just keep trying the next day! With more practice it’ll become easier to get things done no matter how you’re feeling.

Tip #4: change your emotions (i.e. replace lies with truth)

Like I said, being productive when you’re lacking motivation or feeling down is much easier said than done. If you feel like you’re constantly fighting negative emotions in order to be productive, maybe you need to focus on changing the emotions themselves.

What makes you feel unmotivated? When you get to the heart of it, you’ll probably uncover some fear and self-doubt. For example, I tend to get afraid that I’ll fail and disappoint others or let myself down. Or I start to think I’m not qualified to reach my goals anyway, so why should I even try?

I just want to tell you something right now: THOSE. ARE. LIES. They’re not true for me and they’re not true for you either. It’s easy to let our minds trick us, but those lies will ultimately hold you back from living out your calling.

So what do we do about that? We have to fight the lies by replacing them with TRUTH. The truth is, you’re not a failure. But even if you were, that’s not where you find your worth! Your worth comes from Jesus, who bought you with a price. It comes from God, who created you and put you on this planet for a reason.

I hope that as you recognize the lies in your head and replace them with truth, you’ll find the courage and motivation to chase your goals in life every single day. With God on your side, you ultimately cannot fail! How amazing is that?! You’re free to move forward completely fearless and conquer your dreams!

So now it’s time to get going! What are your best productivity tips? Anything you would add to this list? I hope it encouraged and inspired you in some way! Oh and be sure to share this list with someone that you think it could help!

Xo,

Becka

P.S. – 5 life changing books you need to read, and 25 things I’ve learned in 25 years.

The post 4 Productivity Tips for When You Don’t Feel Motivated appeared first on Live It Lovely.